My first 24 hours

Well after 11 hours, 4 wines, 3 gins and a sedative, I touched down in a foggy San Francisco to be greeted with the sight of my dear friend Christopher and his ridiculously adorable puppy Truman...

Still feels surreal to finally be here.. 

Well first night consisted of dinner at absinthe restaurant, with Chris and his dashing beau Cortlin, who generously treated me to a stunning coq u van, washed down with wine and absinthe cocktail. We stopped at a bar afterwards for drinks but unfortunately mr jetlag had other ideas and I had to get back. Good night with wonderful company but my eyelids are closing zzzz....

Friday 9th

First full day in San fran and the jetlag is off the hook. In order to remedy my lethargy I've decided to put my care into the hands of a holistic therapist to see if they can shake my GMT clock and realign me to California timing but not before I gorge on an American breakfast.. 

 

Found a nice restaurant called Stacks and ordered today's breakfast special, which consisted off a gargantuan portion of eggs, scrambled with beef, spinach, onion and Parmesan, with a double load of carbs consisting of potato hash, and a cream cheese bagel. 

Food was fab but as per, I can never even manage to devour half of an American breakfast... Ok, to the spa I go...

Found a place within walking distance from Chris and Corts which offers to transport me back to the womb (no shit). At first I was a little apprehensive but they assured me that no falopian tubes or uterus's are involved in the process. It will be a makeshift womb comprising of a darkened room and plenty of essential oils.. Fuck it! I'm sold! Oil me up my tantric friend... Happy days!

Ok, so far so good. Obligatory effigies of Buddha, the air is secnted with burning sandlewood.. Looks like I'm in the right place!

On arrival I am served a cool elixir of lavender and rosehip and a piping hot towel soaked in lemongrass oil.. Smells amazing and already I feel my chakras slowly realigning! 

I'm then given a questionnaire to complete and bizarrely one of the questions is "what superpower do you embody". Naturally I answered with "telepathy"

2 hours later.....

As we say in the uk, totes amaze! The umbilical cord has been cut from mr jetlag and I'm feeling and smelling pretty damn good. The treatment consisted off lots of heat and oil while I was massaged with piping hot stones. A shamanic ritual of sheer bliss. I'm fully charged and ready to rip a whole in California 

Namaste my friends x